JUNE
Friends online due to distance
Home is quite literally where the heart is. Its true. However, the worlds got smaller hasn’t it. Not wrong, am I? the invent of the world wide web and email has blessed us with contact we never had before.
Distance has a funny way of shrinking the world. Once upon a time, friendship required geography. You met at work, at school, at the pub, or because your mums forced you to play together. Now, some of the most meaningful friendships exist entirely in pixels, time zones, and voice notes sent at wildly inappropriate hours. And honestly? They count just as much.
I have made some amazing friends over the last six years through my website thanks to my writing work, and the generosity of others time. Yes, my Band of Brothers family, I’m talking about you. Whether you are cast, crew, veterans’ family members, writers, or fans, you are all part of a family of people whom I have come to respect deeply.
Online friendships are often born out of necessity. Illness, caregiving, widowhood, work schedules, or simply living on opposite sides of the planet can make in-person connection difficult or impossible. I’ve been through the illness, the caregiving, the widowhood, and work, and am now firmly ensconced on the other side of the world. I have been for over 21 years now. Distance limits the shape of friendships. It reshapes how we reach for people. The internet becomes the bridge. Not a flimsy one, but a very sturdy structure that is built on late night messaging and emails!
There’s an intimacy to online friendships that can catch people off guard. You tend to get straight to the point as there are no distractions. Conversations are written, not rushed. Thoughts are considered.
Online friendships are often dismissed as ‘not real.’ Real is when someone answers a message at 2am because they know you need them. Real is when your friend remembers your husband’s death day anniversary and is not afraid to mention it. Real is when that friend honours your husband. Real is when a friend offers to go to the hospital with you. Real is the one who laughs, cries, and challenges you. Real is the one who is not afraid to tell you when you need to shut up and take a step back.
Online friendships need effort. Time zones are an undeniable cruelty when 16000km separates you! Technology can fail at the most inopportune moments. You cannot offer a hug when words don’t meet a need. But friendship has always involved longing. Humans adapt. We always have. What matters is consistency, care, and reciprocity. Friendship is defined by presence. Emotional presence. Reliability. The quiet understanding that someone is there, whatever the time is where they are, and whether they’re asleep or awake.
Online friendships are not a consolation prize for those of us with no close friends. They are a lifeline. Proof that connection is not bound by space, only by willingness. And sometimes, the people who know us best are the ones we’ve never stood next to, but who have never once left our side.
MAY
Deciding where to go.
How do you decide where to go? Do you grab a map and stick a pin in? Do you make a list of places you like and then decide which one it’ll be? Me? I tend to have favourites. I love the Gold Coast – thank you Q1 for the great trips you’ve given us. I also love Stanthorpe and have been to Diamondvale Cottages a couple of times. My dad? He has been to many places up and down the east coast on trips, so I tend to take his advice more now. When we decide to go for a trip, I ask him for 3 ideas of places to go. Then I get online and search for places to stay in those locations. It is time consuming but very worth it when it all comes together.
I have started keeping a little notebook with lists of my favourite holiday lets. We have been to so many and it’s easy to forget which were the best. For that reason, I started my notebook. When I am booking something, I start with the holiday lets we’ve used before.
One thing I will say, is that you do not need to stay beachside on the coast. Sometimes the best places (and cheaper places) are a few kilometres out of town.
So, what’s my final advice? Know your budget. Know your location. Know if there is somewhere you’ve stayed before. Then it’s easy!
APRIL
54, See I told you it was random
On my last birthday I turned 54. I’m not sure how that happened and if I am honest, I am not sure I will ever understand it. I’m ‘Generation X’ or what’s termed the ‘forgotten generation.’ I’m one of those people that feels like I’m in my 30s, my sense of humour is from my 20s, and my body screams for mercy – yes: one of those.
Age is a weird phenomenon. When I look back at age, my 20s were a busy time. I was working hard, got married, moved house, you know the sorts of things I mean. My 30s felt like an extension of my 20s, like I hadn’t left them behind yet. The 30s were a combination of moving house, changing jobs and emigrating. My 40s were awful. I hated them. I was cajoled into having a 40th birthday party which I detested. I lost people close to me in my 40s, including my husband and mum. I also had cancer. You can see why I didn’t like it much.
But the 50s are here and December 2025 saw me hit 54. I’m officially in my mid 50s and you know what? I love my 50s. My 50s has seen me pick myself up after great loss. It has seen a new chapter of life as dad and I share our living abode. My 50s has seen my writing take off, giving me a purpose. It has seen me buy my own house and set roots down for myself. My 50s has given me some amazing memories with my dad, trips together and concerts. My 50s have given me life.
MARCH
Family Is a Long Conversation That Never Really Ends
Family – I asked a friend to describe it and he said, “it feels like an ongoing conversation—one that pauses, loops back on itself, changes tone and occasionally goes incredibly quiet without ever actually stopping.” Such a great analogy for it. Some parts of the conversation are loud. Some have overlapping voices. There are opinions delivered like facts. You’ll hear laughter that spills over the table and into memories you’ll repeat later as if you were all perfectly behaved. Other parts of family are softer. A look across the room. A shared understanding that doesn’t need words. The kind of silence that isn’t awkward because it is familiar.
Families talk in shorthand. Mine do! Half sentences. Raised eyebrows. Code words that mean nothing to outsiders and everything to you. One phrase can summon an entire childhood. One look can say ‘don’t start, I warned you,’ my mum could do that look well. Family is a language learned early and never entirely unlearned, even when you try.
The conversation changes as time moves on. Parents talk less about rules and more about aches. Children talk less about dreams and more about organization. Roles blur. The ones who once answered everything start asking questions. The ones who were always in charge begin handing things over quietly, pretending it’s temporary, but knowing it’s not. This has happened in my family. The death of two family members, my dad moving in with me and bills, utilities, all going into my name – little things, but done for a reason.
Some conversations are unfinished. Words you meant to say but didn’t. Apologies rehearsed too late. Gratitude assumed rather than spoken. We always think there will be time to circle back—until suddenly there isn’t.
Then the conversation shifts again. It carries on in absence. In remembered phrases. In habits you realise you’ve inherited. In reactions that make you pause and think, T’hat was very Mum/Dad of me.’ Or someone you loved who is no longer here but still somehow part of every exchange.
There are interruptions, of course. Periods of distance where everyone pretends they’re fine without checking in. Family conversations can be messy, funny, exhausting or a combination of them all. They can also resume years later as if no time has passed at all, because history fills in the gaps. My brother and I live 16000km apart but if he walked in the door tomorrow, it would be like we’d never been apart.
What’s strange is how the conversation continues even when no one is speaking. It shows up when you cook the same meal. When you repeat a warning you swore you would never say. When you instinctively know who to call first, whether the news is good or devastating. This has happened to me. My mum and me went shopping and arrived separately. We ended parked next to each other.
Family conversations aren’t always kind, but they’re persistent. They adapt. They survive missed calls, misunderstandings, and long silences. They pick up where they left off, sometimes awkwardly, sometimes with relief, sometimes with laughter at how dramatic everyone was being.
And maybe that’s the point. Family isn’t about perfect communication. It is about continuity. The knowing that even when words fail—or stop altogether—something is still being said.
Because family is a long conversation that never really ends. It just changes speakers, volume, and pace. And if you listen closely, you’ll hear echoes of where you came from in everything you say next
FEBRUARY
I miss getting flowers
There it is. I have said it. I miss getting flowers. I am that kind of girl. You cannot beat the doorbell ringing and someone handing you a bouquet, especially if you were not expecting them! My love of flowers is a bit deeper than that. Let me explain.
As I’ve talked about this month, my late husband hated Valentine’s Day. He would never let anyone dictate when to say I love you, and to be honest, he never needed anyone to tell him. He said it every day. He said it when he left home. He said it before he fell asleep at night. He was that man. To top off that romantic side of him, he bought flowers…. every week. Whether they were supermarket flowers or an Interflora bouquet to say, ‘congrats on a new job,’ there they were…every week. When we lived in the UK, he marked our 6th wedding anniversary with flowers. He planted 6 lilies by our front door, every year adding another one.
The wonderful thing when he bought me flowers, was that it never became an expectation. I always was surprised. He would buy irises (his mum’s favourite). He would buy lilies and most of all, there would be sunflowers. They became symbolic for Mark and me.
So, there it is. That’s why I miss getting flowers. It was a symbol of “us.”
JANUARY
Toast – my ‘go to’ meal
You know those times when you just don’t know what to eat? You might have a fridge full of things but just have no freaking idea what you fancy! You open the cupboard door to a full pantry and still do not have a clue what you want. You can’t be bothered to go get a takeaway so that is out of the question. What do you do when you feel like this?
I have a “go to” meal. It’s clean. It’s simple. It’s easy. It’s toast. Yes, toast. Two slices will do. But here is where another quandary kicks in. What to have on it? Do I make it a toasted cheese? Is it to be a toasted ham? Should I put beans on it and have that? Should I have just butter, or should I go for marmite on toast? Ah, decisions decisions.
Well my friends, I always go for one of the last two options. Marmite or butter. Keeping it simple is the way to go. What’s your ‘go to meal?’
Well, let’s be honest—sometimes the thought of thinking about food is more exhausting than making it. On those brain-fog days, the simplest choice becomes the winning one. It is not glamorous, it is not Instagram-worthy, and it certainly will not feature on MasterChef. But there is a quiet comfort in those two humble slices, golden and steaming, waiting for a generous swipe of butter or a bold layer of Marmite. It is food that doesn’t ask questions. It understands you. It requires nothing but a toaster and a moment of decisiveness!
So, here’s to the unassuming heroes of our kitchens—the pantry staples that whisk us through indecision and deliver a warm hug in carb form. I may not always know what I want, but I always know toast won’t let me down. And if anyone ever tries to judge that choice… I will just offer them a slice and let them join the enlightenment. Now spill it—when your culinary motivation has taken the night off, what dish steps in to save you?
