Millennials: surviving adulthood one overpriced coffee and existential crisis at a time
Millennials will explain that they have been handed a world that promises opportunity but delivers skyrocketing rent, crushing student debt, and jobs that feel like a full-time relationship with no benefits. Add to that a constant stream of social media comparisons, climate anxiety, and the pressure to “have it all” by thirty, and it’s no wonder this generation often feels like it’s barely keeping its head above water. I have two questions:
- Are they the only generations who are or have been tested?
- Have Millennials really got it worse?
Baby Boomers
Let’s step back to the Boomers. We constantly hear Millennials explaining that the Boomers had it easy back in their day and had nothing to complain about. But is that actually true?
I spoke to someone who, by deference to his age, sits firmly in the Boomer camp. He talked to me about mortgage interest rates and work. He said,
“When I was in my very early 20s, I was doing a trade. I had been to college for it and loved it. I worked in a family-run bakery. But the wages were not meeting the needs of our family with a newborn. So, I had to find something else. It was non-negotiable. I just had to find something to bring more money in. I became a bus driver. At every opportunity I could, I applied for promotion and by the end of my working life I retired a Director of the company. I worked hard to make money for my family.”
He went on to explain about mortgages:
“When my wife and I bought our first property, we got a property well under what we could afford. We knew it would leave us room to manoeuvre if anything happened financially. Then the interest rates climbed and climbed to an enforceable rate. Our mortgage rate started incredibly low and ended up at 16 ¾%. We had to massively tighten our belts and do without all the things we would have liked. But that was life. We didn’t necessarily do what we wanted to do. We did what we had to do.”
So, while Millennials argue that housing is out of reach now, Boomers weren’t exactly floating in a sea of financial ease. Their version of stress was different, but real, nonetheless.
Generation X – The Forgotten Generation
Me? I am a Generation X girl, born in the 70s and raised in the 80s. I was incredibly lucky in that I was raised by my stay-at-home mum. While my dad went to work daily, she did not go back to work again until I was fifteen. Every morning, she saw me off to school and every night she was there to pick me up and cook dinner. I spent a fair amount of time staying at my grandparents too, but that was a personal choice. The downside to my childhood was that I did not see much of my dad – he was working all the time to provide for his family.
I started my nursing career at the age of 18 with no university background or degree. I moved out of home and lived in the nurses’ home. One room, bed, window, sink, and shared kitchen and bathroom. That was me at 18. At 21, I met my husband. Neither of us were looking for a partner, but our friendship blossomed and it just worked. We married when I was 22. Our first place was a one-bedroom flat filled with second-hand furniture and kitchen items. But we didn’t care. It was ours. Slowly we worked up the property ladder and managed to get a three-bedroom house. Over the years we had some life changes, including emigration. It took us almost 25 years to get the home of our dreams, the forever home. As much as we wanted everything in life, we were sensible enough to know that wasn’t possible. That’s not how life works.
A fellow Gen Xer, Rachel, put it well:
“As the eldest daughter, invisible parenting went on. You had to figure it out for yourself; everyone else was busy doing their thing. If it didn’t go your way, it was up to you to sort it out. Millennials could not have coped with the 80s as a kid!”
Gen X often gets forgotten in these debates, but our challenges were just as formative: we learned to be resourceful, to get by with less, and to adjust our expectations.
Millennial Issues
Millennials, of course, face a quite separate set of challenges than the generations before them. The internet & digital age has a massive impact on their life. Cancel culture has created a digital minefield where a single misstep can damage reputations permanently. College debt, often the size of a small mortgage, follows many into middle age, limiting their financial freedom and delaying traditional milestones like buying a home. At the same time, they are part of the “sandwich generation,” juggling careers and their own young families while beginning to care for aging parents. Even workplaces that claim to be progressive and inclusive are not immune to subtle discrimination, leaving millennials battling professional obstacles in spaces that market themselves as “modern.”
Beyond these structural hurdles, personal struggles weigh heavily. Substance abuse, alcohol dependency, and sex addiction are reported at troublingly elevated levels. Bullying, once confined to the playground, now follows people home through the relentless persistence of online harassment. Technology, while offering constant connection, has paradoxically eroded genuine human interaction, replacing face-to-face relationships with filtered images and curated feeds. Mental health struggles, especially anxiety and depression, are now at record levels, shaping both how millennials view the world and how they navigate it.
Theirs is a world of hyper-connection but, paradoxically, growing isolation. Every milestone is measured against an invisible yardstick held up by social media: who got promoted, who bought a house, who had children, who looks effortlessly perfect on holiday. The pressure is not just financial—it is emotional, psychological, and unrelenting. Millennials are left trying to thrive in an environment that constantly reminds them they are falling short, even when they are doing more than ever before.
A Gen Xer to a Millennial
I often used to wonder what I would say to a millennial about life, what advice I would give them, but I already know the answer to that question. My million dollar answer is to “get off social media, go outside and touch grass. Pack a picnic bag, take an enjoyable book, and get out of the house.” Easy for me to say I know, but sitting by the river, or on the beach, with a delightful book and a salad I brought from home is great fun. It usually ends with me saying to my dad, “we should do this more often!”
So, Who Has It Worse?
When you line the generations up side by side, what is obvious is that no one has had it “easy.” There is no right or wrong answer. We all had tough times but in diverse ways. Baby Boomers wrestled with astronomical mortgage rates and job security tied to loyalty and long hours. Generation X quietly learned resilience by figuring things out alone, often without recognition. Millennials have entered a world of financial precocity and digital overload, where the rules keep changing, and stability feels like a luxury.
Are Millennials the only ones tested? Not at all. Every generation has been stretched, just in different ways.
Do Millennials have it worse? Financially, yes—the data backs that up. But worse doesn’t always mean impossible. If there is one thing Millennials are showing us, it is that they are pushing for change: for mental health to be taken seriously, for outdated systems to adapt, for flexibility in how work and life balance should look.
And that’s the real point. Hardship is universal, but progress comes from those who dare to question whether things must stay hard. Boomers endured, Gen X adapted, and Millennials—existential crisis and coffee in hand—might just be the ones to rewrite the rules.
Because in the end, the generations are not in competition at all. They are different runners in the same relay: passing down lessons, scars, and resilience. The only real difference? Millennials are the first to run their leg of the race while live-tweeting it, flat white in hand, and wondering if adulthood was always meant to taste this bitter.
