“All things bright and beautiful. All birds that must be plucked. No matter what we choose to do, we’re well and truly…” – Jeremy Clarkson.
Welcome to my review of “Home to Roost,” the fourth, and I hope not the last, book in the series of Clarkson’s Farm. Jeremy’s memoir about his ill-fated and yet passionate attempts to run a farm in the English countryside are a joy to read. The book continues his foray into the world of agriculture with a healthy dose of self-deprecating humour and, of course, his signature blunt commentary.
The book chronicles his chaotic and often comical experiences as a farmer, having bought a small farm in the Cotswolds. But as with any Clarkson book, it is not just about farming—it’s about his personal views on British society, the media, modern politics, and the absurdities of trying to live a “simpler” life when everything seems designed to make it more complicated.
The title, “Home to Roost,” reflects the idea that the chickens (literally and metaphorically) have come home to roost. Clarkson is now dealing with the consequences of his impulsive decisions, both on the farm and in his personal life. Whether it is the challenges of managing livestock, dodging local bureaucratic regulations, or trying to balance his farm life with his media career, Clarkson paints a picture of farming as a mix of frustration, farce, and moments of fleeting success.
As in his earlier farming book, Clarkson brings his usual wit and irreverence to bear on the rural world. He describes his encounters with locals, his experiences with agriculture (or lack thereof), and his general attempts to understand the ways of the country. He also delves into his growing relationship with the farm staff, including his girlfriend, Lisa Hogan, and his occasional clash with those he meets along the way.
The book’s strength is the humour. I challenge anyone to read it without bursting into laughter. Jeremy’s dry and sarcastic commentary on the state of modern Britain, along with his genuine passion for his farm, show two sides to Clarkson. Of course, we have seen the dry and sarcastic side of him on Top Gear, but Diddly Squat has given him a more authentic side, one that the public do not always see. There are moments of reflection about the complexities of food production, the issues of rural poverty, and the challenges of small-scale farming. But throughout it all, the humour stays strong.
Jeremy Clarkson’s ability to bring to life the characters he meets on his farm is another highlight. He paints memorable portraits of the people and animals that populate his world, from the eccentric farmhands to his cows. Whether it’s an encounter with his tractor or his never-ending battle with the weather, Clarkson’s storytelling is always entertaining, even when the subject matter is mundane.
It is refreshing to see that, like in his earlier works, Clarkson is refreshingly honest about his own shortcomings. His candidness about his lack of knowledge about farming, his often-disastrous attempts at fixing problems, and his general failure to “fit in” with the farming community give the book a down-to-earth, relatable feel. This vulnerability makes his jokes land even harder, as readers can sense that Clarkson isn’ttrying to present himself as anything other than a bumbling outsider trying his best.
While Clarkson’s humour is widely appreciated, it is not for everyone. His views, especially on topics like climate change, political correctness, and farming regulations, can be polarising. His direct, no-nonsense approach to these issues will appeal to some readers but might alienate others who disagree with his take-no-prisoners style of commentary. Personally, I like the ‘no filter/tell it like it is’ approach.
“Diddly Squat: Home to Roost” is a fun, lighthearted read that will appeal most to fans of Jeremy Clarkson’s comedic style, particularly those who enjoyed “Clarkson’s Farm” or his other memoirs. It’s a continuation of Clarkson’s personal journey in the countryside, filled with mishaps, laughs, and the occasional moment of insight. While it might not offer anything particularly groundbreaking in terms of content, it’s an entertaining read that fits neatly into the genre of Clarkson’s brand of humorous autobiography.
But every now and then, the sentimental comes out in him. In the book, he says, “However, and here comes the gooey, Christmassy bit that my editor was expecting. This is my fourth Christmas as a farmer but my first where every single thing was grown and reared here. I witnessed the birth of the cow that provided the joint I shall have for lunch tomorrow. I can see the field from my kitchen window where the potatoes grew. The flour in the gravy. The beer. The horseradish. It’s all from here. Even the Christmas tree. I find that weirdly satisfying and I’m not sure why.”
See, there is a sentimental streak in him!
